Your worldbuilding is amazing. From the very beginning I felt sucked into the fighting of these two nations. I genuinely teared up with our parting with Alistair and Luceris's conversation with Helios. I am excited for the next chapter!
I love the premise and it's actually a really good story. It has so much potential, but most of the times I don't feel like I can control the MC at all. Pre-set personality is totally fine, but it feels like my choices didn't matter. Most of the times I wish my MC could say/do things differently. Giving more text flavour to MC's answear/action could make this IF even better! It would be a lot of code work tho, probably...?
I will give an example; when my MC talked with Luceris; I felt like the conversation was being forced to me, as a reader, and I have no control on how the conversation could go. I personally wish she could just ignore him and everyone instead (even Lancelot), I wish that's an option. I think the only option from that conversation was lash out/keep calm. Oh well, I wish I didn't talk with him in the first place. But, if talking with him is an absoultely important aspect for the plot line, I wish she could act in various way, one of it like just listen to his woe is me story and ignore him, merely because I don't wanna talk with my family's murderer lol
And start from there, I don't see much options either, no option on how we could act when we are being looked at, or when we were being called demon, etc. As for now the reader have little control on how the MC could act.
I know the current demo doesn't have a lot of options and it's mainly because I didn't want the personality at 9 years old to affect grown up MC's personality a lot later on so the options were mainly superficial.
I am currently working on chapter 2 and it has more choices regarding how MC acts so I hope you give it a chance!
A gripping game, I feel so bad for the main character. (and helois! oh my god, imagine his reaction when he figures out what his father did? would he be as angry and agree with the actions, or would it make him hate his father??? and with whats happpening at the end of chapter one.... that would horrify me if I was helios or mc! Im so so excited to find out! hes also so silly hes definitely my favourite <33) Honestly, ive been looking for my interactive fictions to get into, and this is just the one. Very excited to read more!
don't remember where nut you have the word "enoug" I think might be missing an 'h'.
and y'know just my preferences talking here but.. found the bit of railroading repeating text a little jarring in a way that wasn't my vibe. also a lot of dripping dialogue lol, why not have some sentences drip with this tone but have the next one laced with it's own and the NEXT honeyed in it's tone and etc etc 👀
Loving it so far and always thrilled to follow a rad newly discovered writer! Waiting with bated breath for more!
Thank you so much! I'm glad you were able to visualize things because of my writing, I've been trying to get better at describing locations to make players feel as if they're there so this means a lot to me. 💗
I'm so looking forward to this. Your writing is amazing and the story is soo interesting. I can't wait to this to continue (I already in love with some characters, they are so loveableee)
This is so good!! Just one little thing to point out:
[SPOILER WARNING]
MC finds his parent's room and runs into the king who has killed them. I chose the option where he finds a sword and stands up to the king stating that he has killed his family. Once Lancelot steps in and saves him, MC asks him if his parent's death is like an illness and if they will stop being dead at some point.
[END SPOILER WARNING]
I find this naivety weird because MC just pointed out that they lost people to killing implying they understand the concept of death. I recommend changing this if they are intended to be naive (which is understandable since they are a young child at this point in time).
It is stated earlier in the prologue that MC doesn't understand what death truly means and you can see throughout the chapter (e.g when MC encounters the dying soldier) that MC is still uncertain on what death looks like. They know the word death but not what it truly means except the fact once people die you can't interact with them. It's almost like an illness in their head, something that can be treated before it's too late.
I hope that made sense, if not let me know! Maybe I should add something like the above in the prologue so it doesn't seem strange. 😅
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The characters are very layered and the situation the MC's in makes us really engage against all the injustice inflicted by the King.
Also, seeing the main characters having their own opinions and visions is great. I like the writing and the UI is good.
Maybe a dark version would be easier on the eyes since I have high eye light sensitivity, although I'll definitely keep my eyes on this IF's next updates as I really like the idea behind it!
Hi! I'm planning on implementing a dark mode in the next update, currently I'm busy so it won't ’t be any time soon I'm afraid. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
For what's here already I really enjoyed it. There are some moments where emotions are forced on you a little though. I get that Lancelot is meant to be a sympathetic figure in an otherwise hostile environment, but I feel that my character warms up to him far too quickly, especially given all my choices up to that point had been either silence or outright hostility. The kitchen scene seems especially chummy given that my character still sees him as an enemy.
This is so good, it's so well written that I actually cried.
/Spoiler:
Reading this I noticed how petty I am, cuz damn I couldn't help myself, I had to tell Helios that his father killed my family lol can wait to see this story unravel and get mc's revenge
Also, I was going to ask is there a road map for this game? Like, are you aiming to release a chapter every 1-2 months or it just happens when it happens? :) thanks
You can almost say you already are halfay in his shoes, in a sense. The man lost a part of his family supposedly due to a murder culprit linked closely to MC. And now MC is in a position themselves where they lost family due to him murdering them.
But there are two possibly big key differences to situation between him and MC. The most notable one being what choice each readers' MC will make when dealing with Luceris: will they continue the cycle the king started or break it in some manner (not exactly forgiveness; just not resorting to his methods). The second (debatable) key difference is...well, MC saw for themselves Luceris had killed their family; was physically there when their home was under attack by him. Luceris, however, only discovered the poison when his wife passed away and has three big evidence that he claims as three big truths. However, while the clues may lead to the direction he and many others are convinced leads to the culprit being no question, they may not be as reliable as many believe. And MC themselves may discover something off if they look closer to things most others (maybe even the king himself) might've just did a glance of.
Man, imagine if it wasn't actually our sister that poisoned the queen and someone used her as an scape goat, what if the ones who poisoned the queen were the people who the king mentioned that frowned upon their union, imagine how the king would felt knowing he murdered innocent people and let an child, younger than his own, to suffer for it?
Again, that's just an random thought, but the angst would be welcome for that guy, I was almost simping for him thinking he had redemption but then that final just poured a bucked of cold water on my sympathy for him 🙂
I was thinking the same thing! I'm wondering if maybe her sister really didn't do anything, but someone else did and just said that she was the one who told the servant to poison his wife.
I think your thought isn't so random; in fact, some things that have come up in the story so far seem to show that Luceris is more in dark about what may really be going on than what he has the capacity to realize right now.
First, let's take a look at Luceris himself. Can we really say he's doing any of this with a clear mind? He was more than willing to send MC to the afterlife with their parents had Lancelot hadn't painted the fact that the person he was about to slaughter was younger than his own son. His goals are driven by his grieving love for a lost wife and a need to fill the hole of the loss by pursuing vengeance against anyone connected to her supposed murderer, no matter how uninvolved they were in the possible plot (like child MC). The moment he was given a name to target, he likely went charging for it and didn't give the clues presented to him the thorough look over needed to spot if something is off. And the years will likely not lessen his emotionlly cws.
Now, let's look at the evidence he presents MC of the sister's guilt as a murder culprit: a plant that is native to the homeland, a maid accomplice witness, and a letter apparently written by the sister. There's no denying all of this is quite incriminating, especially when one also adds the apparent history she has with him. However, all this evidence is not as intangible as he makes it seem; these are things that can be tampered with. And such a obvious path leading to said culprit (one he was strongly inclined to suspect in the first place), it makes the idea she is the true mastermind even more questionable: after all, someone who worked slowly and secretly to gradually poison the queen doesn't sound like a person who would leave behind such a obvious trail...unless they were leaving that trail behind on purpose to misled. And what could be more of a perfect scapegoat to their crimes than someone the king would easily suspect in his emotional state?
Finally, there's the initial rejection path and what it gives players a peek at. I feel it strongly implies that there may be a third party involved in all this, and one that is actively targeting MC and maybe even Luceris or/and Helios as well.
Now all this doesn't completely mean the sister wasn't some part of what happened to the queen; unfortunately there's currently no real solid evidence right now that proves someone else might be involved or that the current evidence has something off about it. But there are bits here and there so far that bring to question just how much can we really trust things are really as Luceris and his subjects make it seem.
This is a really fun chilled game to play. Its like reading a book and making your own story..LOL. The amount of detail and thought that went into it was amazing. If I may suggest if you could add a voice over of some sort for those who maybe don't like reading. But if not its perfect the way it is Great Job!! :D
I just got done playing the first chapter and I have got to say that this is really good and I'm ready for the next chapter.
A side note though, I'm not sure if she's just too mature for a 6 year old or what, but some of the dialogue she says sounds like she's about 14 or so.
I have changed the age from 6 to 9 due to how mature MC seems, it is stated in the story that they are more mature than usual kids but I agree it is too much for a 6 year old so it is 9 now!
I am in tears :,,,,,,,,D, I've only played the prologue so far and I fear the state of my mental health as I continue to play, it's v good so far though! I'm looking forward to playing more!
Although I now have a lot on my mind, there are so many possibilities and ideas developing in my mind, including the MC's older siblings, the necklace, king's true motivation and potential narrative twists ✨, I read this masterpiece again, and gosh is it still as great as ever 💗.
Even though it's only the beginning, I'm already so intrigued by what I'm seeing~
Your story was so great! 🥲 (made me feel so much sadness for MC.)
I thought I would hate Luceris more because he killed MC's family, but I hate MC's sister more for dragging the whole family down for a position.
Also, I think the necklace mc was gifted by their brother is already working because after refusing twice to Luceris offer, I think mc either saw a vision of the future of their death at the cell or got back to before mc refused the offer after mc died then we go back to scene before with a headache this time. If so that some really good foreshadowing of the necklace power and maybe Alistair could be still alive because of the necklace? (I hope so)
Your writing is incredibly to the point it's getting me to think a really hard on the plot. Though I wish for a mc who would want to die do more risky actions to purposely to just die, the reason I even refuse twice was because of that. And if the necklace really has that ability to basically not let mc die then I would expect a mc who wants death to hate that ability maybe? (I'm thinking too hard 😅 I'm sorry.)
Anyways I can't wait for the progression of this lovely piece of work ~💖
i rejected him out of spite😌 im sad this is not a path we can choose because it's kinda sick ngl. aren't we 9?💀
and tbh i also wish for an mc who wants to die just to lay the message "whatever your scheme is, fck you and you will not use me for it"
oh and about your necklace theory, idk i don't think it work like that. it may be that we just hit a bad ending and rewind to the last checkpoint, because mc didn't mention about it. but u may be right about foreshadowing
Just finished the demo! I'm super intrigued and look forward to an update. MC's family seemed so fleshed out and I would love if we could flashback to them and know more about MC's sister! Though, I wonder what the purpose was for making MC a 6 year old? It seems as if you could still get the same effect of dark things happening to a child if MC was older, like 12, 13, 14 and it would also make more sense considering MC's dialogue choices and thought processes seem far more mature than the age they are portrayed as. Royalty or not, I don't know how eloquent a six year old could be in this situation. I really look forward to your next updates!
I have updated the demo with some wording changes and some more options. Let me know if you still think MC seems too mature for their age, would love to hear your thoughts!
Your writing is incredibly lovely ✨ and moving. The plot is really quite incredible.
Please tell me that MC's sweet brother Alistair is still alive and shows up in the future wearing the necklace. He deserves better 😭
Luceris deserves some applause🔪😒 for elevating a 6-year-old child to the position of royal consort. I know it has just started but he already managed to get on my nerves 😂💀 ...that also proves your excellent writing skills!
Apart from that, the ROs appear to be quite promising ❤️ can't wait to spend more time with them! ( I already like some of them 💀, sry I get attached really easily...ik that's bad )
I can't wait for the upcoming chapters.
I appreciate you so much for making this masterpiece 💗
The story is quite dark and sad. It really makes you pity the protagonist. That being said, I enjoyed the game a lot, so well done! <3
Since the Vesphire bloodline is connected to the Gods and magic, will using magic be an option for the protagonist in the future? Might be asking the obvious but I really wanna know lol
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Your worldbuilding is amazing. From the very beginning I felt sucked into the fighting of these two nations. I genuinely teared up with our parting with Alistair and Luceris's conversation with Helios. I am excited for the next chapter!
Thank you! 💗
I love the premise and it's actually a really good story. It has so much potential, but most of the times I don't feel like I can control the MC at all. Pre-set personality is totally fine, but it feels like my choices didn't matter. Most of the times I wish my MC could say/do things differently. Giving more text flavour to MC's answear/action could make this IF even better! It would be a lot of code work tho, probably...?
I will give an example; when my MC talked with Luceris; I felt like the conversation was being forced to me, as a reader, and I have no control on how the conversation could go. I personally wish she could just ignore him and everyone instead (even Lancelot), I wish that's an option. I think the only option from that conversation was lash out/keep calm. Oh well, I wish I didn't talk with him in the first place. But, if talking with him is an absoultely important aspect for the plot line, I wish she could act in various way, one of it like just listen to his woe is me story and ignore him, merely because I don't wanna talk with my family's murderer lol
And start from there, I don't see much options either, no option on how we could act when we are being looked at, or when we were being called demon, etc. As for now the reader have little control on how the MC could act.
Thank you! 💗
I know the current demo doesn't have a lot of options and it's mainly because I didn't want the personality at 9 years old to affect grown up MC's personality a lot later on so the options were mainly superficial.
I am currently working on chapter 2 and it has more choices regarding how MC acts so I hope you give it a chance!
Definitely! I'm interseted to see where the story will go. :)
A gripping game, I feel so bad for the main character. (and helois! oh my god, imagine his reaction when he figures out what his father did? would he be as angry and agree with the actions, or would it make him hate his father??? and with whats happpening at the end of chapter one.... that would horrify me if I was helios or mc! Im so so excited to find out! hes also so silly hes definitely my favourite <33) Honestly, ive been looking for my interactive fictions to get into, and this is just the one. Very excited to read more!
Thank you so much! 💗
Got me tearing up just during the prolog, can't wait for chapter 2 and more, already went ahead and followed ur tumblr and patreon.
Thank you so much! 💗 Your support made me really happy, I appreciate it. I hope you like the content available on patreon!
i loved reading this! you're really good at writing :)
(spoiler review-ish ahead?>>>>>>)
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the part where a nine year old marries an adult is...icky but it hasn't gotten to it yet so i'll hope for the best :0
Thank you! 💗
It's meant to be icky so I hope you feel icky when you get there haha
You're welcome! And oh that makes sense xD
Love this! Looking forward to upcoming chapters
Thank you!💗
first page of the prologue: "led eyes upon".
don't remember where nut you have the word "enoug" I think might be missing an 'h'.
and y'know just my preferences talking here but.. found the bit of
railroadingrepeating text a little jarring in a way that wasn't my vibe. also a lot of dripping dialogue lol, why not have some sentences drip with this tone but have the next one laced with it's own and the NEXT honeyed in it's tone and etc etc 👀Loving it so far and always thrilled to follow a rad newly discovered writer! Waiting with bated breath for more!
Hello, I'm glad you enjoyed it! 💗
"Led eyes upon" is actually correct grammar, I didn't mean for it to be "Laid eyes upon". I'll try to look for the missing h part haha 😂
Dripping dialogue was only used about 4 times in the demo but I went and saw that it was all towards the end so I understand why it felt like a lot.
I have a "report bugs" form on the pinned post on my tumblr blog, if you find anything else like typos then let me know! Thank you.
Huh, I would have thought it'd be lie eyes upon. MY BAD 😞
Is the story finished if not when is the next update :)?
The story is still in development, the next update is expected to be in April.
It’s official! I’m hooked! Your writing is amazing! The way you describe things really made me able to visualize it! I can’t wait for more <3
Thank you so much! I'm glad you were able to visualize things because of my writing, I've been trying to get better at describing locations to make players feel as if they're there so this means a lot to me. 💗
I'm so looking forward to this. Your writing is amazing and the story is soo interesting. I can't wait to this to continue (I already in love with some characters, they are so loveableee)
Thank you so much! 💗
Amazing story!! I really loved the plot! You are a amazing writer! I'm really looking forward to the next chapter! :)
Thank you so much! 💗
This is so good!! Just one little thing to point out:
[SPOILER WARNING]
MC finds his parent's room and runs into the king who has killed them. I chose the option where he finds a sword and stands up to the king stating that he has killed his family. Once Lancelot steps inand saves him, MC asks him if his parent's death is like an illness and if they will stop being dead at some point.[END SPOILER WARNING]
I find this naivety weird because MC just pointed out that they lost people to killing implying they understand the concept of death. I recommend changing this if they are intended to be naive (which is understandable since they are a young child at this point in time).
Hello, I'm glad you enjoyed it! 💗
It is stated earlier in the prologue that MC doesn't understand what death truly means and you can see throughout the chapter (e.g when MC encounters the dying soldier) that MC is still uncertain on what death looks like. They know the word death but not what it truly means except the fact once people die you can't interact with them. It's almost like an illness in their head, something that can be treated before it's too late.
I hope that made sense, if not let me know! Maybe I should add something like the above in the prologue so it doesn't seem strange. 😅
my love for your story and intriguing characters? frikkin wild.
haha cannot wait to see what you write up next <3
Thank you so much! 💗
ohhhh man. so much to dissect with these characters. >:) luceris especially. really really looking forward to more of this!!
Thank you so much! 💗
There is nothing greater than a flawless fantasy-infused revenge tale ✨. The more I read it, the better it gets!
It makes me happy that you've read it more than once, thank you! 💗
ofc I did, it deserves it ✨ 🫡
What does it mean there are no valid storage adapters? It's not letting me play despite using Google chrome
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Why do I always find games this good before they are fully released :c Pls, don't ever quit writing this story. I will simlpy not survive if you do.
Look on the brightside, you're here from the start! I'm glad you enjoyed it. 💗
This was amazing! I'm so ready for the next chapter. Absoultely captivating, I was so sad when I got to the end.
Thank you! 💗 My mission has been accomplished.
Wowe! This is so good! I love it <333
Thank you! 💗
Wow, that was so interesting and captivating.
The characters are very layered and the situation the MC's in makes us really engage against all the injustice inflicted by the King.
Also, seeing the main characters having their own opinions and visions is great. I like the writing and the UI is good.
Maybe a dark version would be easier on the eyes since I have high eye light sensitivity, although I'll definitely keep my eyes on this IF's next updates as I really like the idea behind it!
Hi! I'm planning on implementing a dark mode in the next update, currently I'm busy so it won't ’t be any time soon I'm afraid. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
No rush, keep developing the game at your time. Thank you for your great work!
For what's here already I really enjoyed it. There are some moments where emotions are forced on you a little though. I get that Lancelot is meant to be a sympathetic figure in an otherwise hostile environment, but I feel that my character warms up to him far too quickly, especially given all my choices up to that point had been either silence or outright hostility. The kitchen scene seems especially chummy given that my character still sees him as an enemy.
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Looking forward to the second chapter. This was great.
Thank you! 💗
This is so good, it's so well written that I actually cried.
/Spoiler:
Reading this I noticed how petty I am, cuz damn I couldn't help myself, I had to tell Helios that his father killed my family lol can wait to see this story unravel and get mc's revenge
Thank you so much! 💗
Ahh! This is so good, I'm not usually drawn to fantasy but this has me hooked! I'm so looking forward to the next update!!
Thank you so much!! 💗
Also, I was going to ask is there a road map for this game? Like, are you aiming to release a chapter every 1-2 months or it just happens when it happens? :) thanks
It takes me max 2 months to write and get a chapter edited so I'm hoping chapter 2 will be out in April or before that.
And one more question, sorry. Do you know how many chapters there will be? :)
I'm thinking of 15 for book 1, I want to make it a duology or just 1 book with 2 parts. We will see how it goes!
Omg, i love this so much. I will keep hoping that the brothers are still alive, because of the necklace. Plzmplz plz ,🥲🥲
Thank you so much! 💗
I'm feeling kinda hypocritical. Like if I was in that monster place, I would do the same. But I'm not in his place, I'm in mc's place. So I hate him.
I really like the demo btw 💞
Thank you so much! 💗
You can almost say you already are halfay in his shoes, in a sense. The man lost a part of his family supposedly due to a murder culprit linked closely to MC. And now MC is in a position themselves where they lost family due to him murdering them.
But there are two possibly big key differences to situation between him and MC. The most notable one being what choice each readers' MC will make when dealing with Luceris: will they continue the cycle the king started or break it in some manner (not exactly forgiveness; just not resorting to his methods). The second (debatable) key difference is...well, MC saw for themselves Luceris had killed their family; was physically there when their home was under attack by him. Luceris, however, only discovered the poison when his wife passed away and has three big evidence that he claims as three big truths. However, while the clues may lead to the direction he and many others are convinced leads to the culprit being no question, they may not be as reliable as many believe. And MC themselves may discover something off if they look closer to things most others (maybe even the king himself) might've just did a glance of.
Man, imagine if it wasn't actually our sister that poisoned the queen and someone used her as an scape goat, what if the ones who poisoned the queen were the people who the king mentioned that frowned upon their union, imagine how the king would felt knowing he murdered innocent people and let an child, younger than his own, to suffer for it?
Again, that's just an random thought, but the angst would be welcome for that guy, I was almost simping for him thinking he had redemption but then that final just poured a bucked of cold water on my sympathy for him 🙂
Btw, Love the demo, can't wait for more ❤️
I was thinking the same thing! I'm wondering if maybe her sister really didn't do anything, but someone else did and just said that she was the one who told the servant to poison his wife.
Thank you! 💗
I think your thought isn't so random; in fact, some things that have come up in the story so far seem to show that Luceris is more in dark about what may really be going on than what he has the capacity to realize right now.
First, let's take a look at Luceris himself. Can we really say he's doing any of this with a clear mind? He was more than willing to send MC to the afterlife with their parents had Lancelot hadn't painted the fact that the person he was about to slaughter was younger than his own son. His goals are driven by his grieving love for a lost wife and a need to fill the hole of the loss by pursuing vengeance against anyone connected to her supposed murderer, no matter how uninvolved they were in the possible plot (like child MC). The moment he was given a name to target, he likely went charging for it and didn't give the clues presented to him the thorough look over needed to spot if something is off. And the years will likely not lessen his emotionlly cws.
Now, let's look at the evidence he presents MC of the sister's guilt as a murder culprit: a plant that is native to the homeland, a maid accomplice witness, and a letter apparently written by the sister. There's no denying all of this is quite incriminating, especially when one also adds the apparent history she has with him. However, all this evidence is not as intangible as he makes it seem; these are things that can be tampered with. And such a obvious path leading to said culprit (one he was strongly inclined to suspect in the first place), it makes the idea she is the true mastermind even more questionable: after all, someone who worked slowly and secretly to gradually poison the queen doesn't sound like a person who would leave behind such a obvious trail...unless they were leaving that trail behind on purpose to misled. And what could be more of a perfect scapegoat to their crimes than someone the king would easily suspect in his emotional state?
Finally, there's the initial rejection path and what it gives players a peek at. I feel it strongly implies that there may be a third party involved in all this, and one that is actively targeting MC and maybe even Luceris or/and Helios as well.
Now all this doesn't completely mean the sister wasn't some part of what happened to the queen; unfortunately there's currently no real solid evidence right now that proves someone else might be involved or that the current evidence has something off about it. But there are bits here and there so far that bring to question just how much can we really trust things are really as Luceris and his subjects make it seem.
the king is so creepy bro- like the mc's a whole child they're even younger than his own son!!! D:
but the pure anger and discomfort that I feel towards the king just goes to show how good your writing is
Thank you! 💗
No but highkey tho the king is hella creepy like the fuck he doin marrying a 9 year old 🧐
This is a really fun chilled game to play. Its like reading a book and making your own story..LOL. The amount of detail and thought that went into it was amazing. If I may suggest if you could add a voice over of some sort for those who maybe don't like reading. But if not its perfect the way it is Great Job!! :D
My heart was filled with joy then literally burned, i love it im excited for more+*
I just got done playing the first chapter and I have got to say that this is really good and I'm ready for the next chapter.
A side note though, I'm not sure if she's just too mature for a 6 year old or what, but some of the dialogue she says sounds like she's about 14 or so.
Other than that, I really did enjoy this!
Hello! I am glad you enjoyed it. 💗
I have changed the age from 6 to 9 due to how mature MC seems, it is stated in the story that they are more mature than usual kids but I agree it is too much for a 6 year old so it is 9 now!
Oh okay! I guess the age didn't update in the profile settings. It still showed 6 years old in that while I was playing. But 9 sounds better! :)
You will have to replay it for it to show up as nine! It won't matter in the future chapters though since it'll be a timeskip.
This story is really good, very dark and dramatic. Also, the MC has got to be the most intelligent 6-year-old ever-
I am in tears :,,,,,,,,D, I've only played the prologue so far and I fear the state of my mental health as I continue to play, it's v good so far though! I'm looking forward to playing more!
Although I now have a lot on my mind, there are so many possibilities and ideas developing in my mind, including the MC's older siblings, the necklace, king's true motivation and potential narrative twists ✨, I read this masterpiece again, and gosh is it still as great as ever 💗.
Even though it's only the beginning, I'm already so intrigued by what I'm seeing~
Your story was so great! 🥲 (made me feel so much sadness for MC.)
I thought I would hate Luceris more because he killed MC's family, but I hate MC's sister more for dragging the whole family down for a position.
Also, I think the necklace mc was gifted by their brother is already working because after refusing twice to Luceris offer, I think mc either saw a vision of the future of their death at the cell or got back to before mc refused the offer after mc died then we go back to scene before with a headache this time. If so that some really good foreshadowing of the necklace power and maybe Alistair could be still alive because of the necklace? (I hope so)
Your writing is incredibly to the point it's getting me to think a really hard on the plot. Though I wish for a mc who would want to die do more risky actions to purposely to just die, the reason I even refuse twice was because of that. And if the necklace really has that ability to basically not let mc die then I would expect a mc who wants death to hate that ability maybe? (I'm thinking too hard 😅 I'm sorry.)
Anyways I can't wait for the progression of this lovely piece of work ~💖
Hey!
I like your necklace-related theory and .......I also rejected that tyrant's offer twice 😂...just like how he deserves🫡.
i rejected him out of spite😌 im sad this is not a path we can choose because it's kinda sick ngl. aren't we 9?💀
and tbh i also wish for an mc who wants to die just to lay the message "whatever your scheme is, fck you and you will not use me for it"
oh and about your necklace theory, idk i don't think it work like that. it may be that we just hit a bad ending and rewind to the last checkpoint, because mc didn't mention about it. but u may be right about foreshadowing
Just finished the demo! I'm super intrigued and look forward to an update. MC's family seemed so fleshed out and I would love if we could flashback to them and know more about MC's sister! Though, I wonder what the purpose was for making MC a 6 year old? It seems as if you could still get the same effect of dark things happening to a child if MC was older, like 12, 13, 14 and it would also make more sense considering MC's dialogue choices and thought processes seem far more mature than the age they are portrayed as. Royalty or not, I don't know how eloquent a six year old could be in this situation. I really look forward to your next updates!
Hello! Thank you so much 💗
I have updated the demo with some wording changes and some more options. Let me know if you still think MC seems too mature for their age, would love to hear your thoughts!
Oh how I do love a good revenge story. :)
Your writing is incredibly lovely ✨ and moving. The plot is really quite incredible.
Please tell me that MC's sweet brother Alistair is still alive and shows up in the future wearing the necklace. He deserves better 😭
Luceris deserves some applause🔪😒 for elevating a 6-year-old child to the position of royal consort. I know it has just started but he already managed to get on my nerves 😂💀 ...that also proves your excellent writing skills!
Apart from that, the ROs appear to be quite promising ❤️ can't wait to spend more time with them! ( I already like some of them 💀, sry I get attached really easily...ik that's bad )
I can't wait for the upcoming chapters.
I appreciate you so much for making this masterpiece 💗
Thank you so much!! 💗💗 Luceris really out here making everything worse 😂😂 I'm glad you like the characters (I'm like that too it's okay).
❤️ 🙈
The story is quite dark and sad. It really makes you pity the protagonist. That being said, I enjoyed the game a lot, so well done! <3
Since the Vesphire bloodline is connected to the Gods and magic, will using magic be an option for the protagonist in the future? Might be asking the obvious but I really wanna know lol
Thank you so much! 💗 I'd love to answer that but it is kind of spoilerish so let's leave it at maybe or maybe not ✨️